We live on a spider planet

Everyone born on the planet this blog is published in was a spider in a past life.  You see, Minerva, the spider goddess, rules over our planet as does Jehovah, the Christian god and Krishna, the Hindu god and Buddha, the Buddhist god.  She sends the souls of spiders into humans when they are conceived.

We are literally in hell.  As evidence of this, Jesus did not return promptly after his death and resurrection.  On planets where Minerva doesn’t rule, Jesus returns within the generation.  The longer it takes the Second Coming to happen, the more likely we live on a hell planet where the spider goddess undermines the souls of humans.

We are all eventually going to die forever.  Jehovah, the Christian god, only allows humans to live 5 lives.  Then you have to be a scratch or you have to die forever.  You will cease to exist.  If you want to be a scratch, you will be tortured your whole life.  A scratch is someone who gets cosmetic surgery which results in a scar on the face.  Minerva is okay with this.  Eventually, Minerva will die too and she will be replaced by another spider god or goddess.  Or she will become a scratch.

If you use meth in your current life, you will probably use meth in your other 4 lives.  But most scratches don’t get to use meth.

Our preexistence was the life of a spider.  Our decisions we made when we were spiders determine what type of life we will live as humans.

Jesus also had a preexistent life as a spider.  But, on this planet, Jesus actually dies.  The resurrected Jesus on this planet was just a visual hallucination.  You see, we’re on a hell planet where everyone eventually dies.  So Jesus had to actually die so we could live 4 more lives.

You should try to know what life you’re on.  If you’re on your first life, you have 4 more lives to live.  But if you’re on your 5th life, you’re either going to die or become a scratch.

Some people want to be reincarnated as spiders.  Minerva favors these people and lets them live as spiders.  Holy people on this planet will be reincarnated as an intelligent spider that lives on Kolob with Heavenly Father (Jehovah).  The thousands of religious people who are faithful, mostly Catholics and Mormons, will become one spider who lives with God.  God doesn’t mind spiders.  But they’re not his favorite animal.

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