Sex with a saint

Mary-of-Egypt

When I first became psychic, there were psychic Mormons (many of which are going to telestial kingdom) who told me that the Mormon prophet Ezra Taft Benson told people telepathically that God thought it was okay for people to have mind sex.  Mind sex is basically erotic thoughts shared between 2 psychics.  2 people who are psychic can see each other in their minds and they can have sex with each other in their minds.  So long as you don’t masturbate, it is not a sin.  I have had mind sex with one young Latter-day Saint who smoked meth.  She lives in my neighborhood, but I’ve only seen her in person twice.  Other psychic Mormons told me that me loving her was like the poet Dante Alighieri loving Beatrice Portinari.

My main problem was that I would masturbate when I had mind sex.  I struggled very much with this sin.  I eventually stopped masturbating because of an experience where I had sex with a Catholic saint.  I want to share this with you.

I was reading about a Catholic (rather, Orthodox) saint named Mary of Egypt.  She ran away from home at the age of 12 and for 17 years had lots of sex with men.  She was insatiable.  She handed out sexual favors just for the pleasure of it.  Reading about her made me horny and I decided that I wanted to have mind sex with her.  I remembered the Catholic doctrine of communion of saints and thought that I could conjure her into my mind to have mind sex with her.  This is sacrilege, I know.  But I did imagine having sex with Mary of Egypt.  In the same sexual fantasy, I imagined having sex with Helen Mar Kimball.  Married at age 14, she was the prophet Joseph Smith’s youngest wife.

Not long after I cummed, I felt guilty (as you should feel when you break the law of chastity).  I remembered what I had read about Saint Mary of Egypt going to a Christian pilgrimage and deciding that she would never have sex again.  She took 3 loaves of bread to the desert and after she ate the bread she lived off of the herbs and grains of the desert for many years.  She repented of her sins.  This led me to repent of my sins.  I prayed to her in veneration (not having faith in her like the faith one is supposed to have in God the Father) asking her to pray for me that I may be successful in repentance.  I also prayed the prayer to Saint Michael the Archangel which depicts him thrusting Satan and his evil spirits into hell.

I have not masturbated since then.  I encourage anybody who is struggling with the sin of masturbation to have mind sex with Saint Mary of Egypt.  Read her story about how she was such a little slut from the age of 12.  Look up pictures of her.  It’s hard to find some that make her look attractive.  She was blackened by living in the desert and is portrayed in icons as having no breasts.  She gave up sex when she decided to be a Christian.  You will have to work at it to get yourself aroused enough to masturbate.  But Mary of Egypt will intercede for you and you will stop this grievous sin.  Saint Mary of Egypt will intercede for anybody who masturbates to her.  She, like God, hates this sin.  So much that she learned to hate herself for sinning sexually.  She learned, by living in the desert, to replace feelings of sexual craze with the love of God.

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